We had a great time at the book launch party for my second book, Dancing With Nemetona: A Druid’s Exploration of Sanctuary and Sacred Space. I am so blessed with loving family and friends – they have taught, shared and reinforced everything that I have learned over the years about sanctuary and feeling free to be your true self. May we all be so blessed!
P.S. Well done Conchita this weekend!
A great blog post from Nell…
Not satisfied with the response to a complaint that I had made at the beginning of April regarding two sexist comments that Ken Bruce had made at the beginning of his BBC Radio 2 show on 2 April, I have written back to the BBC and am sharing this story with you. What we say DOES matter, and we need to speak out against what we think is wrong. As a Druid, I take speech quite seriously (when I’m not being The Fool, but there is method in my madness there as well – indeed, a good friend of mine this weekend said that I am one of the most intelligent people she knows, and also the silliest – but I digress…)
What happened was that I wrote in to BBC Radio 2 because Ken Bruce had called Lynne Bowles a “whale” (in jest) and in the next breath said something about her putting on a French maid’s uniform. Many people would say that taking this out of context is making it appear worse than it actually is. What I am saying is that the context of sexism doesn’t matter – it’s still sexism. Ways to undermine women’s power in our society is becoming more and insidious where it cannot be achieved through brute force. Here is the correspondence that I have received back from my complaint, and my further response.
I am putting this here on my blog as well as my Facebook page. My original post in which I tagged the BBC has mysteriously disappeared from my Facebook timeline. It is my intention to make this public, and whether it is simply a Facebook error or a more targeted silencing, I shall never know – what I do know is that they cannot touch this blog.
UPDATE 24.04.13: BBC’S MOST RECENT RESPONSE BELOW. Am trying not to bang my head against the desk…
______________
Dear Ms van der Hoeven
Reference CAS-2646747-YB2LTD
Thanks for contacting us regarding Ken Bruce on BBC Radio 2.
We note you were unhappy with the manner in which Ken started his 2 April programme. You felt he made demeaning remarks about Lynn Bowles.
We appreciate your concerns. Ken, as a highly experienced broadcaster, is well aware of the boundaries of acceptability. The changeover with Chris Evans and his programme team was clearly intended as light-hearted banter between professionals who are well used to working with each other and treating each other with respect. We regret the dialogue didn’t meet with your approval on this occasion and we hope you otherwise enjoyed the rest of Ken’s programme.
We’d assure you your concerns have been registered on our audience log, which is a daily report of audience feedback that’s made available to many BBC staff, including members of the BBC Executive Board, channel controllers and other senior managers.
The audience logs are seen as important documents that can help shape decisions about future programming and content.
Thanks again for taking the trouble to contact us.
Kind Regards
Lucia Fortucci
BBC Complaints”
Dear Ms Fortucci,
I am writing in response to your reply to my complaint made last week.
I am not as certain as you or the BBC are of Ken Bruce’s awareness of the levels of acceptability regarding boundaries – simply because he has had years of experience does not mean that what he says and does is always acceptable acceptable.
Sexism can be a very insidious creature in our society, and sexism, even in the form of “light-hearted banter” is wholly unacceptable. Should we allow bullying and racisim if it is all in the name of good fun? I think not. I don’t think the BBC are taking this issue seriously enough. While I have enjoyed Ken Bruce’s programmes in the past, I really do hope that these words and sentiment are actually taken seriously by the programmer himself, and not simply fobbed off as a registered complaint that no one will see because they are not required to look at all the feedback when it comes to programming. Issues like these have been swept under our society’s carpet for years.
For me personally, sexism and sexist words are never acceptable, and I shall speak out against them whenever I experience them. Sadly, this is still too often even in our so-called “modern and liberated society”. I feel that our liberties may be taken away should sexist comments continue to be made in any fashion, whether spoken in anger or in jest, for the very nature of sexism is to undermine a woman’s personal power, and can be done in a myriad of ways that are “acceptable”.
Regards,
Joanna van der Hoeven
Dear Ms van der Hoeven
Thanks for contacting us again regarding Ken Bruce’s comments at the beginning of his show on 2 April.
We’re sorry to read you were dissatisfied with the previous response. As such we forwarded your complaint to the programme makers who would like to apologise for any offence caused to you; however regular listeners to Ken’s show will regularly hear endearing banter between Ken and Lynn Bowles about each other for pure entertainment and are in no way deliberate attempts to be sexist.
At this stage however, if you believe a serious and specific breach of the BBC’s Editorial Guidelines has occurred with this programme and you wish to pursue this complaint further you can contact the BBC’s Editorial Complaints Unit (ECU), within 20 working days, and they will carry out an independent investigation.
You can e-mail them at ecu@bbc.co.uk or alternatively write to them at the below address quoting the following case number CAS-2658696-YB869Z:
BBC Editorial Complaints Unit
Media Centre
MC3 D3
201 Wood Lane
London
W12 7TP
______________________________________________
Dear Mr Martin,
Would I be endearing myself to you if I called you a whale? I’m not trying to be deliberately sexist, but how about you go and put on a French maid’s uniform for me?
The issue isn’t whether or not it is deliberate – deliberate or not doesn’t make it right, or acceptable. I find it appalling that the BBC feel this way.
Sincerely,
Joanna van der Hoeven
_________________________________
Dear Madam/Sir of the Editorial Complaints Unit at the BBC,
I began this complaint with regards to remarks made by Ken Bruce. What I would now like to complain about is the complacency within BBC that allows sexist and demeaning comments to be made under the pretense of “endearing banter”.
Both responses I have had from the BBC have brushed this off under the carpet of “enterntainment”. There is nothing funny about derogatory remarks or sexism. Only when we see that, when we break free from accepting these abuses under the guise of comedy and entertainment will we actually be able to move forward as a species.
These remarks may not have been made deliberatly by the presenter, Ken Bruce. However, that doesn’t make it right, or absolve it in any way. People need to be made aware when they are crossing the lines, either what would be the point of having any lines in the first place? People in the media have an especial responsibility to choose their words carefully. I only hope that what I am saying will be taken seriously by someone, and that more thought will be behind the words of BBC radio two presenters such as Ken Bruce.
Yours sincerely,
Joanna van der Hoeven
Good words here by Kevin…
A friend and colleague has been asked to teach a class on Feminist Spirituality. I also had a great conversation with Bobcat and she shared some thoughts about the gods that got my mind going. I have been pondering deity and gender. Out of these sharings, this missive was born. I hope it is good food for thought.
I think isn’t helpful is for people to get caught up in gender language when talking about spiritual matters. For example, why can’t “god” be without gender reference? “God” is like a four letter word, like “Lust”, “Fuck”, “Food”, “Stop”, “Back! -off”. It burst out of us because it is a verb, not a noun. It is guttural, bursting out like a yell, a great expression, exhalation, exaltation. We are speaking of movement and emergence when we speak of “God”. This isn’t a thing. It is an event, a powerful force of…
View original post 1,447 more words
Here is my “revised ending” to the traditional song/story of Willie and Mary, which, in its various guises, always bothered me how the woman just accepted being tested by her love after years and years of waiting. She never got upset about being tested after all that time. Me, I’d tell him where to go. So here’s my offering – the last two verses are my “revisited version”. 🙂
Willie and Mary (revisited)
As Willie and Mary met by the seaside
A long farewell for to take
Said Mary to Willie, “If you go away
I’m afraid my poor heart, it might break”
“Oh don’t be afraid, dearest Mary,” he said
As he clasped his fond maid to his side
“In my absence don’t mourn, for when I return
I will make you, sweet Mary, my bride”
Seven long years had passed and no word at last
Mary stood by her own cottage door
A beggar came by with a patch on his eye
Bedraggled and ragged and tore
“Your charity, fair maid, bestow upon me
Your fortune I’ll tell you beside
Your lad that you mourn will never return
To make little Mary his bride”
She slipped and she started, saying, “All that I have
It’s freely to you I will give
If you tell me true what I now ask of you
Is my Willie dead or alive?”
“He’s living,” said he, “though in sad poverty
And shipwrecked he has been beside
When he’d money untold and pockets of gold
He’d have made little Mary his bride”
“Then if he is dead, no other I’ll wed
No other I’ll have by my side
For in riches though rolled or covered with gold
He’d have made his own Mary his bride”
Then the patch off his eye the old beggar let fly
His old coat and crutches beside
And in sailor’s blue clothes and with cheeks like the rose
It was Willie who stood by her side
“Oh don’t be afraid, dearest Mary,” he said
“It was only your faith that I tried
To the church we’ll away by the break of the day
And I’ll make little Mary my bride”
With eyes afire did Mary face the liar
“My faith was not yours to be tried
I’ve kept my heart mired, I never did tire
And your test I’ll no longer abide
Through the longest of nights have I cried and I cried
Seven long years I stayed true
Though suitors have tried they lay not by my side
All for my sweet love in you
But now you’ve impressed, beggarly dressed
And lied to me, thinking you’re dead
Your love’s not the best if it requires a test
My own company I’ll keep instead”
I now have a new website – have a look and tell me what you think! I tied the format in with this blog, keeping it very simple and with the same colour scheme. I’d appreciate your thoughts… x
A great blog post by Cat!
The year is turning still. In the Western Hemisphere in which I live, Spring is indeed springing all around, with the brightness of daffodils, the unique smell of showers on fresh grass, and birds chattering amidst green leaves.
This is also a time of celebration for many. Pagans have just marked the Vernal Equinox with Ostara; Hindus are joyous with Holi, the amazing festival of colours and love; and Christians are in the middle of the intensity of Lent.
Each of these is very different, but it is fascinating to compare how different faiths mark this time of year. From very personal, private rituals and promises to large public statements, it seems that many of us are doing something to actively notice the budding of new life around us, and inspiration within us.
Despite – or perhaps because of – my primarily Pagan path, I’ve been reading…
View original post 936 more words
Spring – it certainly has sprung here in the UK! The tulips and daffodils are out, the sun is shining (at least where I live on the east coast) and the earth is warm to the touch. The birds have changed their song to ones of sunlight and warmth, of nesting and mating, of the months ahead and the lengthening days. The foxes are creating an almighty ruckus at night, and the lizards are coming out to bask in the sun.
It’s time for spring-cleaning in my home – really cleaning the house from top to bottom, doing the floors and dusting the blinds, washing the windows and cleaning every nook, cranny and crevice. It’s amazing how great the house feels after a good cleaning. Every autumn and every spring I do a Big Clean, getting ready for the months ahead. I feel I am overdue for my spring cleaning.
The chores of housework can seem daunting to some, boring or tedious to others. To me they are a delight. Really, I hear you say? Really?
Yeup.
I used to hate housework as a child – we had our daily chores of trying (and in my case failing) to keep our rooms and closets in order. We also had our chores every Saturday when my Mom got the house clean – I cleaned the bathroom, my sister dusted the living room and my parent’s room, my brother tidied the boot rack (to this day, I believe he got off too easily…) while my Mom did laundry and cleaned the kitchen. Dad was usually outside doing gardening in the summer or gone to work in the winter. Every Saturday morning, I dreaded the drudgery of chores when I’d rather be watching cartoons, reading or playing outside.
As such, my room and closet were always a mess, and I may not have done as good a job as I could have in the bathroom. It’s funny how much a person can change though. I hate living in a messy place these days. I find that it depresses me, makes me sluggish and feeling just plain lazy. When the house is clean, the dishes are done and the floors swept there is a different energy in the house. It smells clean. It feels clean. The energy seems to move easier, flowing with ease where it might otherwise become stuck on a stack on dirty plates, or picking up bits of cat fur from the “dustbunnies” on the floor (oh Spring, for anyone with a pet – you know what I mean in the shedding season!).
Doing the work is just as rewarding as having the clean house at the end. It can be enjoyable. I can stop thinking about all my other jobs that are waiting – the essay due, the proofs of the next book, getting my dance class organised, arranging diary dates, thinking about upcoming workshops, retreats and speaking engagements. I can simply focus on the task and let my mind rest while my body works. It’s marvellous.
Really taking time and care can also help you to get back in touch with your home. Really picking up each item you dust, looking at it, feeling the surface that it sits on. Feeling the dishes and warm water on your hands in the sink- washing dishes is lovely in the winter, when my hands are so often cold. It’s so nice to sink them into warm water and let them do their work.
I love housework. I love laundry. I love dishes. I love cleaning the toilet. I love dusting. I never, ever thought I would say that.
Now, I must turn that way of thinking towards all the chores – I mean delights, waiting in my garden!
Down the Forest Path 