Dealing with Bullying

1902780_825582470792076_380046463_nBullying in any shape or form, whether in person or online, is a very difficult thing to deal with. I’ve had my fair share of it, with trolling on my social media sites and the occasional personal attack/character defamation (mostly from people whom I’ve never even met). This has again happened to me very recently, and thankfully it’s only the second personal attack that I’m aware of using myself as the subject.  It’s a slog to get through it all, and can make you despair at the human race entirely, but I’ve come up with some ways to deal with bullying, which may help you if you ever find yourself in such a situation. If you are in physical danger, please contact the authorities at once. Here are 10 ways you can work through this situation, should you find yourself being bullied in any shape or form.

  1. Don’t take it personally. Though you may be the subject, actually, it’s not about you at all. It’s about them, and their own insecurities, fears and suffering. When you can see that, you can also develop compassion for them. They are not faceless entities, even though they may have piled on you as such. These are real, living human beings, who are someone’s son, daughter, lover, mother, father, brother, sister. They have their own difficulties, their own lives, their own past experiences and suffering. They have some very large misperceptions about you, and that’s all. You are not the cause, but the subject of their misperception and subsequent projections and personal suffering.
  2. Don’t lash out emotionally. Disengage. Hurting someone who has hurt you only prolongs and increases the suffering in the world. Define your boundaries, so that you do not hopefully have to undergo something like this from the person again. If this means blocking someone on social media or email, or avoiding them in public, then do so. If the circles you work or live in don’t allow for a full disengagement, then do what you can to not allow their misperception into your physical space or your mind.
  3. Talk to and find a support network, whether that is your family and/or friends. Don’t encourage people to take sides, and turn it into a “flame war”. Simply find support from them, allow them to remind you of who you are in their eyes, what they mean to you and the difference that you make in their lives. We can often forget this when we are going through bullying, and can easily get sunk into a pit of suffering and wondering, “why me”. Allow these people who are a real part of your life to rekindle your sense of self, and your life’s meaning for them. Then find out what your life’s meaning is for yourself.
  4. Work with gratitude. After you have disengaged and hopefully have found some support, take a moment to remember all the good things in your life. These will usually far outweigh the bad things that are currently happening, which can seem overwhelming at the time (thanks Kris for this one). Take some time to yourself, make a cup of tea, and sit down in a comfortable, cosy room, taking time to remember everything that you can be grateful for: a loving family, good friends, a roof over your head, your snuggly cat, the beautiful sunshine, the nourishing rain, your heroes and heroines, the delicious cup of tea. You can even make a collage with photos of all these things and hang it in a prominent area of your home, to provide you with a visual reminder each and every day.
  5. Talk to respected people in your community. Chances are they’ve gone through something similar. If you poke your head above the parapet, expect to be shot at. So, they may have some good advice to give you on getting through, as they’ve been through it themselves. You don’t even need to give them the full details, just ask for their advice on bullying in general, and how to overcome the horrible feelings that it invokes.
  6. Have compassion for yourself, as well as for everyone involved. Acknowledge your feelings, your sadness, your anger, your despair. Don’t try to push them aside, for they will most likely come back in some shape or form that is totally inappropriate. Sit with your feelings, allow them to move through you, and then you can let them go. Water needs to flow in order to not become stagnant. So too does energy, in my opinion, and energy needs to flow. Emotions are a form of energy, and so let them flow, in a safe and responsible way. Be emotionally responsible for your own feelings, and know what belongs to you, and what does not. When you can let go of what does not belong to you, you are well on the way to your own personal sovereignty.
  7. Everything is impermanent. This is pretty much the first and foremost Buddhist teaching. What you are currently going through may seem like hell, but in a few days, weeks or months, where will this all be? If it helps, remember past difficult times, and how you survived those (without engaging in the suffering from these past experiences – look at it like a scientist would look at data, and make a conclusion based on that). Look to your family tree, and find out how your ancestors struggled, and made it through. Again, your friends may help in this regard as well. Next year, where will all this be? Where will this episode be? Most likely far, far away, remembered as an experience from which you learned how to become more resilient and compassionate.
  8. You are not better than them. Often, the advice given to you can be “you’re so much better than them”. While you may not cause suffering the way that they do, you are not better than anyone else on this planet. As soon as you think this, you have elevated yourself above someone else, which means that you have de-humanised them or turned them into a faceless “other”. We are all in this together. Do not let ego interfere in the process. Remember who you are, without any ego inflation tactics, which are only temporary, and which in the long-run can lead to very poor behaviour on your part.
  9. Integration. This is at the heart of all the Druid teachings for me. Remembering that we are all part of an ecosystem, and that everyone has a role to play. This correlates to the point above. Everyone has something to contribute, and from everyone a lesson can be learned to help us become better in ourselves. Not better than any other person, but better in ourselves so that can positively contribute and make this a truly flourishing, functional ecosystem.
  10. Endurance. Treat it like an athlete treats endurance training. See it as good practice for holding on to your principles. See it as an excellent workout for the mind and the soul. But remember to take breathers when you choose not to engage or think about it. Do not think ‘this is ill fortune’, but ‘to bear this worthily is good fortune’. (Thanks to Katie, and her Stoic studies for this one!)

I hope that this helps, if ever you find yourself in such a situation. If you do, remember that many people have experiences this, and that you are not alone. Get outside, look at the birds flying overhead, the bees in the garden, and notice nature all around you. You are never alone. You are part of something truly beautiful, so do try to focus on that. And have a big, virtual hug from me.

Harvest Blessings

6Blessings of Lammas/Lughnasadh/Gwyl Awst to you. May your harvest be abundant and rewarding, and may we learn from our experience to carry knowledge forward into wisdom.

I have just come back from a four day road-trip with two of my best friends into the heart of the Wiltshire landscape, poking our noses in Somerset to visit Glastonbury and participate in a workshop run by author and activist Starhawk on Sunday as part of the Goddess Conference’s fringe events. To say I am shattered is an understatement; my body has shut down completely, and I am now suffering from a cold as well as my monthly moon-time a week early. When will I ever learn???  Easy does it!

At any rate, it was a magical time, with perhaps the most transformative event being a quiet meditation upon West Kennet Long Barrow. The harvest was in full swing in the landscape all around. Where we came from in Suffolk, the harvest began in early July, as we hadn’t had rain for two months. They were a bit more fortunate down in the south-west, and the harvest timing was more in tune with the Wheel of the Year than over in the East, where everything seems rather disjointed this year.

silbury hillSitting on top of the barrow, I could feel the energy of the land around me, as well as the energy of the ancestors and the barrow itself beneath me. The land’s energy was golden like the sun, flowing and bright. It was a stark contrast to the energy of the barrow, which was dark, cool and quiet. In the landscape, looking out over at Silbury Hill, I could feel the richness of this time of year, and see the ancient priests of the land atop the platform of that great hill, directing the ritual observances for honouring the harvest and the land, beginning at The Sanctuary and flowing all throughout that wonderful temple radiating outwards from Avebury’s henge and circle. Everything was in motion, everything was in full swing.

But beneath me was the silence of death, of deep stillness and quiet. Despite the bus load of tourists that had come and gone while I was meditating, I could still feel that deep sense of rest beneath me. I made my way down and into the barrow itself, stopping at the entrance to honour the ancestors. Deep within the barrow, in the furthest accessible chamber, I stood, honouring the silence of death.

But then the sounds of life came from the entrance, as baby birds chirped in their nest upon the arrival of their parents. Two families of swallows were nesting just above the entrance-way to the tomb, and the cycle of life and death seemed complete, and ever entwined, like beautiful Celtic knotwork or the spirals of the triskele seen upon so many of the neolithic and megalithic structures that abound in these British Isles.

We had just come from Swallowhead Spring, where it was a trickle in the dry landscape. Watercress choked the river Kennet, and the spring itself was dry.

We later moved to The Sanctuary, to experience this wonderful temple. It was like travelling back in time. We also visited the so-called “Moon Temple” that has been discussed in recent editions of Pagan Dawn magazine by geomancer Terence Mead. Sadly, we were unable to actually get close to the temple, as the farmer has moved all his cows, calves and a great big bull into that square kilometre where much of the temple lies. Shame, as we had walked miles and miles to get to it!

At Avebury we planned to hold a small ritual, just the three of us, during the lunar eclipse. We found a quiet corner, well, quiet for a minute or two before an old man tottered towards us as we had begun! It was all very odd, as he came near and then rolled out a blanket to sit upon, and made as if he was going to have a little nap. He stayed for a few minutes, then packed up again and made his way back the way that he had come. All very odd! We wondered if he was really real, and perhaps was, in fact, a spirit of place come to visit…

The eclipse was hidden behind fast moving clouds, and it seemed like the Wild Hunt was out riding early. The main part of the circle and henge had an air of a festival about it, so we kept to the quiet fringes and away from any crowds. As the wind picked up and our tired limbs grew heavy and cold, we called it a night and headed back to the hotel.

All in all, it was an interesting trip, deep in the heart of such a sacred landscape. But is has also made me very aware of my own landscape, and how sacred it is to me personally. I won’t be heading back that way for some time now, for I found myself missing my land, my locality, more and more as each day passed. The long six-hour drive home was taxing, and I am so grateful now just to be home, still buzzing from the experience at West Kennet, but rooting my feet firmly into the sandy heathland soil of home.

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The Threefold Law

threefold lawLately I’ve been thinking about this concept, as I am doing a lot of reading and researching at the moment, and keep coming across this concept is a lot of Wicca/Witchcraft books. While I know that there are many traditions in Witchcraft that do not follow this concept, some do, as well as most (if not all) Wiccans, and it’s got the brain going, considering this concept more deeply and not just taking it for granted.

I don’t think I’ve ever really believed in this concept in the way that most believe. In the threefold law, in many, many sources it states that whatever you do will return to you threefold. In a very simplistic sense, if you do good things, good things will happen, and if you do bad things, bad things will happen. Many sources state that this is rule of karma.

karma dilbertI feel that this is a very odd Western misinterpretation of karma, for starters. As well, I know of plenty of instances and people who do good things, who go through the ringer, and plenty of people who do bad things, and don’t seem to suffer any consequences. (Trump, anyone?) Karma is not a system of reward and punishment. As well, the Hermetic principle of like attracting like can work in this instance, but not in the way that most people would believe. It’s not that simplistic. Note that I use the word simplistic, rather than simple, because there is a huge difference, at least in my opinion.  Let me explain.

A lot of magic uses correspondences in order for success, according to the principle of “like attracts like”. This can also work in our daily lives, but it doesn’t mean that doing good things will make good things happen to you, or vice versa. We can’t control reactions to actions on that level. We can try and use magic to persuade a favourable outcome, and when combined with a good ethical stance this would be for the benefit of the whole. But there is a correlation.

I feel that when we do magic, or perform any sort of action whether on the physical or metaphysical level, we affect energy. This for me feels like a more appropriate definition of correspondence. That energy is not only external to us, but will affect us on three levels. Those levels are:

Physical

Mental/Emotional

Spiritual

Let’s take an example of cursing someone. If we curse someone, we must be pretty pissed. That anger will have an effect on us at each of these three levels. We know that emotion, memory and other things can get stored in the body, creating tension, stress, high heart rates and more. As well, when we are angry our mental and emotional levels change, and we become the anger if we are not careful. When we become anger, we have lost our sense of self, our authentic being, and have allowed anger to take control. On a spiritual level, anger does not help us to commune with the world, the ancestors, spirits of place, deity or anything in a deeper level. In fact, it can be a great hindrance to it, as integration is at the heart of most spirituality and religion. In an earth-based tradition such as Wicca, Witchcraft or Druidry, where we believe that deity is immanent, this means that when we are angry and curse someone, we do not recognise the divinity within others. When we curse others, we are, in effect, cursing the gods too.

The popular interpretation of The Threefold Law to me feels more like a reward/punishment system to keep people in line, in an overly simplistic fashion. It requires people not to think too much about all the areas in between the concepts of “good” and “bad”, or even how those concepts are so relative to each person and their own experience. It also doesn’t acknowledge the deeper levels of meaning that can occur if we ponder this “rule” more closely. To me, it just seems too close to a heaven/hell concept, which I find too simplistic to give much attention to. Others may disagree, and I honour their perspective, but it just doesn’t work for me.

suffering mark levineSo, looking more deeply at The Threefold Law, if we do something bad, like cursing someone, then it could be said that on a certain level it comes back to us threefold, but not in the sense that seems to be very popular, ie. do good and good things happen, and vice versa. But if our actions are not honourable, and if we do things to harm other people, we are in turn harming ourselves, our environment, our gods: everything. Harming others causing suffering, both externally and also within in a threefold pattern: we harm our physical, mental and spiritual wellbeing. We’ve lost that connection to everything else, that sense of integrity and integration.

If we curse someone, we affect ourselves physically by holding on to that anger. That affects us mentally, and if our curse does indeed work, might even lead us down the road to more cursing. This leads to a reinforcement of such behaviour, and also reinforces the anger within us, which will make us physically and mentally suffer more and more. We can often fall into a deep depression by holding onto this anger and feeding it, instead of seeing the positive in the world around us. We will become angry people. This all has an effect on us spiritually as well, for we have denied the existence of deity outside of ourselves. This severely limits our perspective of the world, and just continues an ever increasing downward spiral of behaviour that causes suffering both within and without.

So, the Threefold law can affect us in three different ways, but it’s not as simplistic as some would have you believe. It’s simple, yes, but not simplistic. Let’s not get the two muddled!

And, if in doubt, you can always follow this great maxim: don’t be a jerk.

jerk jude

 

Beautiful Moon…

full moon 3

Photo credit: Stephen Rahn

Last night we had the most wonderful full moon, in a beautifully clear sky (though cold!). As I held my full moon ritual in my back garden, waiting for the moon to rise above the giant ash trees opposite the tiny valley, I looked back upon my path and all that I had experienced on this wonderful, magical journey. When the moon rose high enough, I went down into a small clearing where her light shone upon the dried grass, and lay down upon the earth to re-dedicate myself to The Old Ways.

I have felt my path shifting, changing since Beltane, and the stirrings of something new are rising within me. All signs point towards a new project, of taking up the reins in this journey and directing the energies towards my ultimate goal. There are stirrings, ideas, rumblings inside my head, and as I gazed out at the moon I felt overwhelmed by a tidal wave of love that just poured out of my breast and out into the world. My love for the natural world knows no bounds, and I deeply honour my Lady of the Moon and my Lord of the Wildwood for their blessings.

So, new things will be afoot in the next couple of years.

In the meantime, my last book for the Pagan Portals series, The Hedge Druid’s Craft: Walking Between the Worlds of Wicca, Witchcraft and Druidry will be available tomorrow (Friday, 29 June). As well, my new book with Llewellyn, entitled The Book of Hedge Druidry: A Complete Guide for the Solitary Seeker will also be out around this time next year.

I look forward to walking this journey with you all. x

Solstice Blessings!

May the light and magic of midsummer bless you all!

The Crane Bag: Audiobook!

 

Coming out on 1st July (Canada Day!) will be the audiobook version of The Crane Bag: A Druid’s Guide to Ritual Tools and Practices. Here’s a little sneak preview…

What to wear? Ritual Clothing…

10 (800x590)What to wear in ritual? Whether you’re a Druid, a Witch, a Wiccan, a Heathen or from any other path this question often comes up. The simplest answer is: wear what you like. However, let’s go into more detail, for the sake of this blog post!

I come from a Druid/Witch/Wiccan background. When I first began on my Pagan path, I performed my solitary rituals either in the nude or in robes that I had made. It all depended upon the season, the intention of the ritual, and practicality of it all. Some indoor magical workings and rituals I would do without a stitch on, as I felt that was most appropriate. As well, having just come out of a ritual bath, it was easy! I have also done some solitary outdoor rituals in the nude, such as honouring the solstice while dancing outside in the warm rain, away from prying eyes. The feeling of the warm, humid air and the rain on my body were wonderful, and is an experience that I will always remember and treasure. However, that ritual was performed during a Canadian summer, where the temperature soars to a very humid 32 degrees, and wearing anything or even moving causes one to break out in a sweat. It was also raining, which meant the bugs were in hiding, and the mosquitoes and blackflies which would otherwise eat me alive were not present.

In a British summer, things can be very different, and four seasons in one day is not uncommon. As well, there are less wild places to be in Britain away from prying eyes, as there are just so many more people on this tiny island than there is spread out across the vastness of Canada. Working in the nude can be extremely liberating, and many of modern Paganism’s leading people such as Wicca’s Gerald Gardner and Druidry’s Ross Nichols were firm believers in naturism: that being unclothed in nature had great benefits to one’s physical and spiritual health. However, in my opinion it can also be cold, uncomfortable and inappropriate.

It is entirely your choice as to how you wish to dress, or undress for ritual. If you are performing it in a public place, then you must remember that in most countries, it is illegal to be nude in public. The laws and the sensitivities of others must be taken into consideration. Some would argue this, such as those who at large Pagan festivals prefer to walk around naked, but I feel that this is inappropriate for many. We do not know everyone’s story, and so to be confronted by a naked person can be very upsetting for some people. There may have been past sexual abuse, or ongoing abuse in their lives. We have to think of the repercussions of our own actions and behaviour, how they will affect others. We are still able to express ourselves in freedom, without upsetting other people.

White Spring 1 (6)The last time I was as the White Spring in Glastonbury, it was open to the public and three women went in the main pool (not the bathing pool, I might add) and performed a ritual there in front of everyone with two of the three ladies completely starkers. While that may have been appropriate for a private ritual, when the public are also walking around it is, in my view, highly inappropriate to do so. Imagine a nun from France visiting, or a young schoolgirl who is asked by her teacher “What did you do this weekend?” and she replies “Daddy and I went to the White Spring and watched naked ladies in the water”. I have performed private ritual at the White Spring in the nude with friends, and it was absolutely lovely to immerse ourselves in the sacred and very, VERY cold water (we had to use the main pool, as the bathing pool wasn’t in existence then).

Here in Britain, it is highly unlikely that I will perform any ritual naked out of doors. Even my backyard is overlooked by neighbours either side, and so I keep my clothes on. As well, it’s usually too cold to go out romping in my birthday suit. I completely understand why some people feel the need to do ritual naked, but I don’t see the point when it is illegal, uncomfortable or inappropriate.

Making your own robes can be a richly rewarding practice. There are many simple robe designs that you can find online easily, and all you need to do is have some fabric and a little skill with a needle and thread. I would suggest using fabrics that are natural and that don’t have any man-made material in them if you plan to wear it in ritual, and they are lying next to the skin. Rayon for instance has a tendency to melt onto the skin if caught in a candle’s flame. Also robe designs with big bell sleeves are a no-go for anyone working with fire. No one wants a human torch as part of the ritual!

Many people like the old-fashioned appeal of robes for ritual, feeling that this harkens back to a time that seems more magical than today’s modern age. However, plain comfortable modern clothing can also be appropriate for ritual, if you have no desire or skill to make your own robes. We don’t know if our ancestors, whether they be witches, druids, heathens or whatever dressed in different clothing for every magical working or religious rite. They may very well have worn whatever they were wearing that day, that week, that month (depending on how often they changed their clothing).

1902780_825582470792076_380046463_nWhen I am trudging out onto the heath for ritual, I wear good boots as I live in adder country. I usually also wear trousers such as jeans that have a heavy material which the gorse cannot penetrate, or at least knee-high boots that can ward off most of the pricks and thorns. I like the dress in natural colours, mostly greens lately as I find this personally pleasing. Green is also a colour associated with the faeries and the Otherworld, and in my current work is very appropriate.

In group ritual, sometimes those organising ask people to come along and dress in specific colours that honour the festival or season. Midsummer might be in fiery hues, for example. Some may wear modern clothing in the appropriate colours, others go for full-on gowns or robes. Either way, this is a nice way to get people together with a certain theme in mind and create a sense of community and harmony, whether you are in modern clothing or ritual robes; at least you’re somewhat matching. Much like making your own robes, doing this can also put you in a ritual frame of mind long before you have left the house. You are already thinking about the ritual as you are choosing or making your clothing. The ritual, indeed, has already begun.

Some people like to wear clothing that is true to ancient times according to their tradition. This can be wonderful way to connect to the ancestors. It is also a lot of fun! Many people who are involved in re-enactment organisations and who are also Pagan like to use this as a theme for their ritual garb. Reconstructionist paths do much the same.

A89A4891 (1024x683)The most important thing is that you like what you are wearing. Even if it is a simple piece of ritual jewellery that you can hide underneath your shirt, if that pleases you then wear it wherever and whenever you do ritual. Being comfortable is also a big factor, as being hot and uncomfortable, sweaty or cold is not really all that conducive to productive ritual. Let what you wear (or don’t wear) reflect your true self, in accordance with the law and propriety. And most of all, let it be fun and enchant you, and be a contributing part of the ritual if you so wish.

 

 

 

Women of the Mabinogion

Here is the essay version of my presentation for Leaping Hare. I hope you enjoy it!

Women of the Mabinogion (Rhiannon and  Blodeuwedd)

rhiannon-boulet_susan_seddon-kb_ssb_rhiannon_2For the longest time I found myself unable to connect, or should I say, unwilling, to try to connect to the stories of the women in the Mabinogion. For those who don’t know what the Mabinogion is, it is a collection of the earliest prose stories of the literature of Britain. The stories were compiled in Middle Welsh in the 12th–13th centuries from earlier oral traditions. The two main source manuscripts were created c. 1350–1410, as well as a few earlier fragments. These stories offer drama, philosophy, romance, tragedy, fantasy and humour, and were created by various narrators over time. Scholars from the 18th century to the 1970s predominantly viewed the tales as fragmentary pre-Christian Celtic mythology. Today, we can appreciate the tales for the beautiful and sophisticated work that it is, stemming from an earlier oral Celtic tradition and recorded by Christian monks over time.

In this recording of earlier tales from a different and conquering religion, of course there were misunderstandings and certain flavours that did not sit well with the monks, and so modifications no doubt were made. Whether these were intentional or not we will probably never know, however, we can peel back the layers with what we know of the Celts and their predecessors, to make the tales come alive again to the Pagan soul.

I will admit now, that I am certainly no expert on the Mabinogion or Welsh mythology. Rather, this little presentation is to share my experience with coming to terms with what I had previously seen as an anti-feminist doctrine or propaganda. I also admit that I originally took the tales at face value, and only after having spent many years delving into the history and mythology of the Celtic peoples have I come to a better understanding, and been able to see more clearly just what the tales have been trying to tell us all along. My work with the Sisterhood of Avalon has helped me greatly in uncovering the real strengths of the women in these tales, and the messages that they are trying to convey through the mists of time.

I shall start with Rhiannon. She’s a well-loved goddess, sometimes seen as a Faery Queen. When I first came across this goddess, I could relate to her as a goddess of the land, symbolised by the white horse. I’ve always loved horses, and so discovering another horse goddess was a real treat. But then I learned more of her tale, and that’s when things started to get sticky for me.

Rhiannon had a child with her husband, the king, Pwyll. The child was stolen one night, and her handmaidens, being afraid that they would be blamed for their incompetence (and probably rightly so) killed a puppy and smeared its blood over the bedsheets where Rhiannon slept and where her child had slept. Upon discovering this horrible scene in the morning, Rhiannon was accused of killing her child, and was condemned to punishment. Her punishment? Being a horse goddess, she was condemned for seven long years to carry visitors to the court upon her back after relating the story of what she had done to deserve this punishment, while she sat on a horse block (this is a block used to mount up and get in the saddle, which takes the stress and strain of a human’s weight pulling down on one side of the animal during mounting). Rhiannon obliged, and for seven years she performed these tasks.

Not exactly the most inspiring feminist story ever told, is it? Why didn’t Rhiannon challenge the women who falsely accused her? Why didn’t she stand up for herself and deny the charge in the first place? Why did she accept the punishment so easily? When I first heard this myth, I was disheartened. I wanted strong goddesses to work with, like Morrigan. What on earth was this horse goddess doing, and what does that teach women today? And so, I left Rhiannon far behind, and have only come back to her recently, and learned of other women in the tales contained within the Mabinogion in the last few years.

Let’s begin with looking at Rhiannon as a goddess of sovereignty. Through her marriage to Pwyll, she connects the Otherworld to this world, and consecrating and blessing the choice of king, as was the way in Celtic lands. As representative of the land itself, she offers up many things without discrimination. She is compassion and nourishment. In the association with the horse, she is strength and working in relationship with a partner (think of a horse and rider working together). She is a Great Divine Queen, and indeed, I later found out that her name shares roots with that of Morrigan and Rigantona, who also are Great Divine Queens.

So what does this teach us? Well, it teaches us of patience, compassion and hope. Seeing Rhiannon weather her trials and tribulations with grace, never faltering in her duty can inspire others to do the same. She is a goddess of endurance, a reflection of the strength and endurance seen in her symbol, the horse. She is grace under pressure. She is true to herself, even in the midst of chaos and unjust treatment. She knows what can be changed, and what cannot. She picks her battles wisely.

She also teaches us of inner sovereignty as well as outer sovereignty. Her dignity never leaves her, even as she carries the few people who do choose to accept her offer of being carried into the court. She knows that the truth will win out in the end. She knows this because she is the land itself. The land knows things that we humans do not. The land knows the bigger picture. She knows that there will be challenges, hard challenges but still she does what she needs to do. She knows the right order of things, the way that the land needs to be in order for everything to prosper, even if the humans of the court do not know this. She teaches us not to give in to victimhood or self-pity. She knows that all things will pass, and this is simply one circumstance out of many that lie ahead.

When I found these deeper layers to her being, I was able to resonate more strongly with her story. So many women can relate to being betrayed by other women. So many women are made to live their lives according to what others think they should be. But Rhiannon stands strong in that, while not succumbing to the lowest common denominator. Rhiannon’s son is eventually restored to her, now a little boy of seven years, and Rhiannon returns to her place as Queen. Her son’s name became Pryderi ap Pwyll, which means “Care, son of Wisdom”. If we are strong enough, and if we do not lose our compassion, but still care for things and have compassion while undergoing the trials of experience which lead to wisdom, then we will follow in the footsteps of this goddess of sovereignty. Forgiveness is necessary in order to move forwards. The past cannot be changed, but we can be healed of the wounds of the past in order to provide for a better future. In doing so, we become sovereign of ourselves, making choices based upon the current moment, and not out of fear or hurt of the past, or worry about the future. Rhiannon teaches us that we have choices, and that the choices that we make can either destroy a kingdom, whether it be an external literal kingdom or our own inner kingdom, or we can hold it together until a better circumstance presents itself. Through her own strength of will, her own dignity and grace, she is able to overcome it all. Well, she is a goddess, after all!

While we may not be so graceful and dignified under pressure, it is certainly something to think about and perhaps strive for in our daily interactions. It made me see this Celtic Welsh goddess in a completely different light. The tale has helped in my own journey to find inner peace and sovereignty of my own self. She reminds me to be as compassionate as I can, as well as showing me how strong I can be against the trials and tribulations of the world, injuries and injustices and more.

Another goddess whose story I originally balked at what that of Blodeuwedd. She was a woman created out of flowers in order to be married to Lleu. This story in itself connects with another goddess from the tales, Arianrhod. She laid three tynghedau, the Welsh equivalent of the Irish geis, upon her son: that he should have no name save one which she herself provides; that he should not bear any arms except those that she provides; and that he should never marry a woman from the race of Men. These “rules” may seem harsh and unpleasant, a kind of “wicked stepmother” scene apart from the fact that she is indeed his real mother. But again, when we peel back the layers of the story, we understand more. In ancient times, it was the mother who often bestowed a name, arms and chose a wife for her son. I’m guessing the monks who recorded these tales didn’t quite “get” that idea, and so made her out to be a wicked woman denying her son of many things. And so, Lleu gets his uncle to “make” him a wife, and he creates one out of flowers and she is named Blodeuwedd, or Flower Face.

Arianrhod’s tale continues, but now I’m going to focus on Blodeuwedd. A woman created for a man – hmm, where have we heard this story before? This might very well be a take on the Christian tale, and the original meaning of it lost to history. However, we can look deeper at many parts of this tale, to see the strengths found in the feminine.

BLODEUWEDD 3Blodeuwedd was the model wife, for a while. But eventually, while the husband was away, she fell in love with Gronw, a neighbouring lord. They lay together for three nights, and then Blodeweudd decided to plot against her husband, in order to kill him and live instead with Gronw. She schemed until she found out how she could kill her husband, who was not easy to kill, ie. he cannot be killed indoors or out, on horseback or on foot and only by a spear that took a year to make and was only worked on during Sunday mass (a forbidden, holy time, which is quite interesting and an open “nod”, if you will, to the story’s Pagan origins). Blodeuwedd discovers how to do this by asking her husband, who seems rather stupid really in giving her all these answers to these riddles, and then Gronw sets to work on the spear.

So when the spear is ready, she makes a bath for Lleu on the banks of a river and builds a house of thatch with only a roof and no walls. She brings either a buck or goat, depending on which translation of this tale you read, and then ask him to show her how he needs to stand with the animal in order to be killed, which he does. Really. Gronw then rises from his hiding place and throws the spear at Lleu, which injures him. As he lies dying, his uncle Gwydion comes and turns him into an eagle in order to save his life. Blodeuwedd and Gronw return to rule over the court, while Gwydion then goes in search of the eagle that flew away, eventually finding him and restoring him back to his original form. After a year has passed, Lleu returns to court, and demands that he should enact the same deed that was done to him, upon Gronw. Gronw has no choice but to accept to keep his honour, but he requests that a stone be placed between him and Lleu. Lleu agrees, and throws the spear, which goes right through the stone leaving a great hole, and kills Gronw. (The stone can still be seen today, with a great big hole through it). Blodeuwedd runs away, but Gwydion tracks her down and turns her into an owl, as “punishment”.

When I first read this tale, I thought “My, what a horrible woman”. But when I looked deeper, and applied what I knew of Celtic mythology and lore, a new picture began to emerge. There are a couple of tales where two kings fight, usually over a woman, such as one of the tales of Gwynn ap Nudd, or the more recent Oak and Holly King. The woman represents the land, and decides who has sovereignty over which part of the year. Lleu means “light” and Gronw is associated with darkness. So, we can see the cycles of the year represented in the “battle” between the light half of the year, and the dark half of the year, with the goddess of the land choosing her mate at the appropriate time.

In lying with Gronw for three nights, this is actually a form of marriage in ancient Celtic law. There were many forms of marriage, this being just one of them. So it is easy to see how the goddess of the land, the one who was literally “made” from the land out of flowers, chooses who will be king. She is dutiful to Lleu during the appropriate time, and then weds Gronw again when the time comes to move into the dark half of the year. In this regard, Blodeuwedd is another goddess of sovereignty.

She herself transforms as well, from that which turns to the light, ie. flowers, to that which turns to the dark: an owl. Married to Lleu, as a flower she turns to the light. Married to Gronw, she is a creature able to see clearly in the darkness, and fly free. The monks who wrote this tale down saw the transformation into an owl as a punishment, and recorded it as such, but really what would you rather be? A flower or an owl? Something rooted to the land, or something that can fly, see in the dark, is an exceptional hunter and which is utterly gorgeous?

Perhaps Gwydion did not change her at all. Perhaps Blodeuwedd changed of her own accord, so that she could fly free and exist in the dark half of year with the appropriate king and husband. Perhaps she will return again the spring as the flower, making the cycle complete. Perhaps that is the truer, older tale.

Blodeuwedd shows us that in us there is both light and shadow, and that we must acknowledge both these aspects of ourselves. For if we do not, if we abandon one for the other, we become imbalanced. We need winter just as we need summer.

With Rhiannon and Blodeuwedd, we can find tales of the stories of women, their struggles and their pain, their choices and the cycles of life, death and rebirth. We can still find them in the old tales, even through the thin veneer of a conquering religion at the time. We have to be able to open up our perceptions, however, to look deeper, as well as do the research into the time and place when these stories occurred. We need context. Without knowledge of ancient Celtic lore, these stories, taken at “face value” in the Christian context can seem utterly demeaning towards women. But when viewed on a deeper level, with what we now know of Celtic lore, as well as the cycle of the seasons and looking with a Pagan eye, we are better equipped to fully understand just what the stories were trying to say.

My work with the Sisterhood of Avalon helped me to better understand these women’s stories. The SOA uses the tales of Rhiannon, Blodeuwedd, Ceridwen, Arianrhod and Branwen to move through cycles of healing and transformation. The creator of the SOA, Jhenah Telyndru, is a wonderful woman and scholar in Celtic studies, bringing good research and lore to a deeper understanding of the myths and tales. You can find out more about the SOA at sisterhoodofavalon.org.

Their stories are our stories. Even today.

 

Druidry Online Course

We’ve had a winner in the e-newsletter prize draw, and congratulations to Kelly Pederson!  The course is now available to all, and here are details of what it includes:

  • A 118 page pdf document containing information, practical exercises, things to think about, reference and suggested/further reading
  • Audio mp3 files to complement the course, including two meditations and a journeying session, as well as a storytelling session from Robin Herne and a chant to be used in ritual by Joanna van der Hoeven
  • Email tutorship from Joanna and Robin throughout the duration of the course. You can take the course as your own speed, there is no time limit.

So, what does this course cover? It covers the basics of Druidry, including:

  • What is DruidryDruidry Course Photo
  • What is Relationship?
  • History of the Druids
  • The Gods in Druidry
  • The Spirits of Place
  • Working with the Ancestors
  • The Quarter Days and Fire Festivals
  • Druid Ethics
  • Druid Philosophy
  • Awen
  • Altars and Ritual Tools
  • Magic
  • Ritual Structure and Performance
  • Meditation
  • Prayer
  • Anarchy and the End of Submission
  • Suggested Reading List

How much does this course cost? It is £75, which includes the pdf file, the audio files and the email correspondence with both tutors. You may correspond as little or as much with the tutors as you like. Payment can be made via online bank transfer, or by cheque in British pounds.

This course is aimed for those new to Druidry, and can also serve as a good refresher for those who have walked the Druid path for many years. It is based on the teachings we provide at Druid College, condensed down to an introduction to Druidry and offered alongside guidance provided by both tutors. This course is about reweaving that connection, our connection to the land, the ancestors, and the gods.  It is about learning the native spirituality of these British Isles, and exploring how they work in the wider world.  As an introduction into the path that is Druidry, it focuses on our relationship to the land, the ancestors, the gods and the spirits of place.

What you get out of Druid learning is what you put into it. There is no room for passivity; Druidry is very much an active path. No one can do it for you.  You must search out the awen, the inspiration yourself.  Teachers may act as guides, priests may work as celebrants in ritual, but they do not take the place of active learning on the individual level.  No one can do it for you.

So we actively encourage you to take those first steps along the path, and to hold the intention of your learning close to your heart as your journey. Know that the work that you put in will reap benefits, for yourself,  your own sense of well-being and for the earth as a whole. For we are all part of the great tapestry of life.

If this sounds like something you would be interested in, then please email autumnsong@hotmail.co.uk to register.

We hope that you will take this journey with us. In the meantime, awen blessings!

Joanna and Robin

Introduction to Druidry Online Course now available!

It’s here! We have finally completed our Introduction to Druidry Online Course, written and tutored by myself and Robin Herne. It’s over 100 pages long, and also comes with audio files such as meditations and a journeying, as well as a storytelling session by Robin. For more information, please email autumnsong@hotmail.co.uk. As well, I am offering one lucky person the course, FOR FREE, if they sign up to my monthly e-newsletter, the details of which will be found in March’s e-news, out on 1st March. You can sign up to my newsletter through my website, on the homepage at www.joannavanderhoeven.com.

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